One Life Can

Everyday for the last five years of my life it’s a routine – wake up, go to work, go home, sleep. My world is all about working 12 hours a day, 6 days a week and on the 7th day I need to do household chores. I came to a point that I am not happy anymore with my life until I met a girl at the office. Jaq is so full of life, enjoys every moment of her life both inside and outside the office. She turns negative things into positive things.

My office table was moved next to her and I am not really comfortable with that because I feel that we have opposite attitude and that we may not get along. At first we do not talk to each other until she went to my table and hand me some of her snacks and everything is history. She taught me to loosen up. To work and have fun at the same time. She also taught me to have a life after work. We both went to the gym, learn new stuffs, travel, go party, go shopping, go to the spa and all other girly stuff. I even helped her pick the anchor design on her tattoo.  I felt like I am a better happier person. It made me excited to wake up every morning, it made me happy going to work. As months past I’ve realized that life is not just working hard and doing all the responsibility that you need to do, it’s also about having fun and dealing with everything in a positive way. She taught me that the more positive you are towards life the happier you will be.We may not be seatmates anymore but thanks to the girl with the anchor tattoo for she is still always there for me.

My brother-in-law calls me Kuya. He’s not Pilipino so to have him call me Kuya so naturally and with respect touches me. I couldn’t have asked for a better person to be with my sis. She is my world and I am fiercely protective of her. So it gives me great comfort and peace to know that she is with someone of character, strength, and integrity. To watch how sweet and thoughtful he is with her honors me and my family. To see how he is raising their boys to be kind and thoughtful little gentlemen brings a smile to my face. He does me a kindness every time he shows his love for them. I am very lucky to have him be a part of my family. Love you, bayaw.

Everything wasn’t turning out the way that it was supposed to that day. I was in a foul mood and I decided to spend the day roaming around the shopping mall trying to pass the time; trying to calm my nerves, make the day alright.

As I walked around, I chanced upon a middle-aged man. He was sitting down on the sidewalk seemingly observing despite the fact that he was obviously blind. He had a blank stare but his mind appears to be thinking so many things. He touched my leg and asked me, randomly, out of the blue, if I was having a bad day. I looked at him in surprise. He said he could feel my aura – disturbed and irritated. I was about to shrug him off, regard him as a foolish man who had nothing else to do with his free time until he said, “Remember that there are far greater things that other people lack but they still try to appreciate what they have than you who has everything yet complain about the littlest things.” I turned around and observed his eyes. He still had a blank stare yet there was so much wisdom, so much truth in what he said.

Although he couldn’t see me, I nodded at him and made my way home.

The day my Mom passed is the single greatest, defining event in my life. Everything I had ever worked for was to give her the life of comfort and happiness that her many long years of sacrifice and hardship had denied her. So it is that with her passing I now live my life trying to earn the opportunities that her life paid for me.

On the day of her passing, LR flew to Hawai’i to be by my side. I had only known LR for a short while and had not yet deepened the bond of brotherhood which we now share. For a new friend–a new acquaintance, really, if we’re being honest about it–to take time and money, when a new college grad has small supply of both, to be there for me is probably the single greatest act of compassion that kept me strong during a tragedy that could have very well broken my spirit. If for no other reason than that alone, LR will forever be my brother.

In the years that have followed, LR has been the big brother I never had. Has been my partner-in-crime. He is the first person I call when my moral compass requires calibration. I have also been fortunate to see and experience that the kindness LR showed me that day is the substance of his character and that his life is going on to touch others as he did mine. To him I say: any time, any where, for any thing, I got you. I love you, brother.

“I know that you are destined for greatness.” SZ said that to me many years ago and it has always fueled me to try to live up to my potential and to earn that faith he has in me. SZ is one of those I call my brother. He told me once that being friends with me was really hard but so worth the effort. He didn’t say that because he meant I was difficult. He said that because he always felt the weight of trying to live up to some standard of friendship, undying loyalty and character that I exhibited to all my friends. He said it was hard to face up to the failings and insecurities we all have and the fear of living up to those expectations.

He’s dumb. Because SZ has taught me more about friendship and brotherhood than I could have ever shown him. His moral character, his selfless generosity, his unflinching instinct to help someone in need makes me want to be a better person. It makes me feel the weight of not being the best friend that I can be.

SZ is the perfect example of One Life Can.